Day 31 - Still Here!

Tonight as I sit in God's presence I am thinking to myself, "What's the point? Is God even here? I've taken on more than I can handle here, and my poor family has to keep putting up with me disappearing off on my own.... and to top it all, I just keep nodding off in my chair, I can't keep awake! Am I really waiting on God or am I just wrapped up in my own thoughts?"

Maybe you've found yourself doubting a venture you're embarking on and find yourself, like me, losing heart. Well, this morning I read Psalm 27 and the verses at the end suddenly came back to me. Here they are:

'I would have lost heart unless I had believed

That I would see the goodness of the Lord

In the land of the living.

Wait on the Lord;

Be of good courage

And He shall strengthen your heart;

Wait, I say, on the Lord!'

God wants us to have strong hearts. Sometimes we get it muddled up and think the best way is to harden our heart. But, actually, a hard heart can smash whereas a strong heart bends like a tree in the wind. A strong heart can be hurt, oh yes, but how much better to allow our heart to hurt a little than to keep people at arm's length and shut out love from our lives.

So I'm still here, Lord, waiting for you.